beginning [Approved]

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beginning [Approved]

Post  tristep on Mon Jan 25, 2010 2:40 pm

Frank was born on new vegeta and was trained to become a super saiyan he started training at age 3 (he was really smart 120 iq) and when he reached age 6 he was over 9000!!! (lol) at age 9 he started a red aura field around him (it was barely faint but he was still very amazed) age 12 he got in trouble for beating the crap out of one of new vegeta's soldiers. so he was sent to a war school to train 40x harder than he usually did. age 13,14, and 15 his aura could easily be seen. And age 18 he graduated from war school and his power level was high enough to break anyones scouter that focused on him. now hes training 50x a day to become a super saiyan
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  ssj3 on Mon Jan 25, 2010 2:46 pm

((That's a pretty hard training program. Very Happy))
Korn: OOC text = (())
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Makes me wonder

Post  Valken on Mon Jan 25, 2010 3:24 pm

(( You do know that even if you try to post your characters power level being super high you only start off at 40 right? plus a little description for your story would help a lot too I give you credit for not trying to start off as a Super Saiyan like some people do but still you might want to check out how other people who have posts that have been accepted started their characters and follow in that manner otherwise like I have said before it would defeat the purpose of this being a social rp
P.S. A little imagination will go a long way and don't think I'm trying to be mean I only want to help so you can get accepted sooner))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  Xicor on Mon Jan 25, 2010 3:27 pm

((This has no plot. You're telling how he was at what age. Check out mine or Valkens for an example, bcuz this is awful))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  Valken on Mon Jan 25, 2010 3:42 pm

(( Aww be nice Xicor, it's just lacking depth and description along with a total lack of the limits of the rules as a lot of people seem to have a hard time with it's not a big deal really just try again and keep the criticism in mind and do yourself and everyone a favor don't take what anyone says to heart just try again Very Happy ))
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ok

Post  tristep on Mon Jan 25, 2010 4:55 pm

((ok hows this.)) Frank was actually born on the 3rd moon of new vegeta but then his moon was overun by namekian assualtants. His parents were killed while they were putting frank in one of the last capsule spaceship. Traveling with frank was his birth certificate along with some desperate favors from his parents. While he was traveling one lone alien was watching him depart from his home planet. After a week traveling in that little capsule he crashed landed in a small hut in the middle of one of vegeta's biggest cities, Toledo. He was raised by warriors barely getting by with their funds. Their names were Tausaria and Casarian. They had 3 girls about 13 years old. The first one was named named Casey she was a blond and a talented warrior at that she knew every kind of kung fu and martial arts. She owns training facilities around New Vegeta. She wore pink and yellow saiyan armor. next was named kara she was more interested in her power level. you could always see her aura, no matter what. She is the owner of a company that makes special fabrics that increases people's power level. She wore red and white saiyan armor. The last one was named samantha, she was very interested in tactics and what moves to use at the right time, you could say she was the brains of the group. Sam is the owner of the company that makes saiyan armor. She wears blue and black saiyan armor. After Frank hit age 3 his 3 foster sisters started training him to become the strongest warrior he can be. They took Frank to their mansion (that they share rent to keep) and They all took turns traing with Frank. Casey taught Frank everything she knew about hand to hand and a little blade. Kara trained frank in aura and energy attacks she taught him his famous full power energy stream and kasemunu. (aura and energy infused punch) And last but not least samantha taught him tactics and helpful saiyan moves (flight,ki blast, and ki powered punches and kicks) After 6 years of training he still practices with his sisters, hoping to get even stronger then them. Even if that wasnt enough some 5 star war camp watched frank go up against 3 of their strongest recruits. Now Frank was supposed to stay there for 12 years but he was only their for 4 years. Due to his umbelievable iq level for all 3 classes. (tactics,hand to hand,and aura power) Once he got to his foster home after graduation, everyone in his family got him something. His parents got him his own saiyan armor (the first color was red and the secondary color was black) Casey got Frank the diamond katana they practiced with. Kara gave Frank a new technology in the market. it was a glove, but she didnt know what it did but still she thought it would help frank in the near future. Then Samantha gave Frank something the family was waiting to give him when he was 18. Sam gave Frank the diamond necklace that his mom gave Frank before she died. Frank still lives with his sisters. And he still trains with them. (i know what your thinking the sisters are still stronger than Frank) But he still needs to train to defeat the evil growing in New Vegeta. And the new evil growing inside of him.

Zeny:165
PL:40
STR:15
AGI:5
END:10
SPR:10


The End isn't near, The beginning is just starting


Last edited by tristep on Tue Jan 26, 2010 3:14 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  Valken on Mon Jan 25, 2010 5:29 pm

((Much better but keep in mind the items you say you have Korn will have to okay before you can ever use them in battles and such, as far as your role play you stepped it up very well from what you had at first good job! Very Happy ))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  tristep on Mon Jan 25, 2010 5:34 pm

((tnx dude hopefully he lets those items pass))
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Just a reminder

Post  Valken on Mon Jan 25, 2010 6:00 pm

((remember that all posts made on any of the forums except the general forum you should use (( )) around everything you type as it states you're speaking out of character))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  Korn✔ on Tue Jan 26, 2010 6:10 am

((Its ok, but would be better if you will use Capital letters at the starting of each sentence, name and organize it a bit so it will have more spaces and easier to read. And use the edit button, don't post another message Smile ))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  Xicor on Tue Jan 26, 2010 9:21 am

Valken wrote:(( Aww be nice Xicor, it's just lacking depth and description along with a total lack of the limits of the rules as a lot of people seem to have a hard time with it's not a big deal really just try again and keep the criticism in mind and do yourself and everyone a favor don't take what anyone says to heart just try again Very Happy ))
((I AM nice. I'm completely sure that i typed P.S.Not trying to be rude. I dont know where that faded.))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  Valken on Tue Jan 26, 2010 10:47 am

((Maybe faded behind the not so nice things you said? lol! just joking but does anyone else agree that his second post was much better than the first?))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  tristep on Tue Jan 26, 2010 2:26 pm

((tnx so Korn is it approved??))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  Korn✔ on Tue Jan 26, 2010 2:53 pm

tristep wrote:((tnx so Korn is it approved??))
((Just edit it like I said in my other reply and your approved))
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tnx

Post  tristep on Tue Jan 26, 2010 3:15 pm

tnx Korn now it looks a lot better
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Too forgetful..

Post  Valken on Tue Jan 26, 2010 8:03 pm

(( While saying thanks you forgot to put the OOC brackets ---> (()) <--- it may seem a hassle but yes it's necessary it just makes things look proper Razz by the way Korn maybe check out the character sheet for tristep because the items mentioned in his post he seems to want to use them permanently and gave them some stat bonus's that make the gear in the items section look like junk. not trying to make fun or anything just pointing it out so you can approve or disapprove them for him ))
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Re: beginning [Approved]

Post  Korn✔ on Wed Jan 27, 2010 6:15 am

Approved!
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